Better late than never?

I never claimed to do things right.  Or on time.

Today I had a panic attack.  At 3:20 today I realized that I had a scholarship essay that I needed to have postmarked.  By today.  It had to be typed or printed on plain white paper, mailed to an office downtown.

Of course, it was only halfway written.  Once I finished I remembered that I didn't have a printer.  I raced to my parents house.  By some miracle I got there in 20 minutes.  It was 4:30.  I started up this dinosaur of a computer.  I hunted for printer paper (of course there was none in the printer tray).  I scribbled an address on a tiny little envelope I found, sent my mother in search of a stamp and after about 12 minutes was finally able to get to the word document.

Print.

"You should have called me, I could have fired this thing up for you!"

"Mom, I called you three times."

"...Oh.  Well, I think my phone... I think it's on the charger..."

If you're keeping track, It's now 4:42.  Awesome.  Of course my document printed in both black and gray writing.  Okay.  I just needed to find some more paper.  Why on earth can't I find any paper at a computer desk?

"Mom, where is some more paper?"

"I don't think we have any more."

We HAVE to have more paper.  We have to.  Dig, dig, dig, dig.  Eureka.  2 fresh white piece of blank paper. (It was a real short essay -- that's what they get for not giving me a length requirement.)  I pop those in the printer, make sure all the font is black (because naturally, it wouldn't be), aaaaaaaand print.  It worked.  Hallelujah.

"By the way, Danna, what post office are you going to?  Because the one in Mustang closes at 4:30 but the one in Yukon is open until 5:00."

Seriously?  Now all I had to do was fold up this essay and put it in this tiny little envelope, this stupid tiny thing, the only one I could find.  It is not freaking fitting.  Unfold, refold, restuff.  It still doesn't fit?!  Ugh.  I tried again and quickly gave up.  This is not going to fit into this envelope.  I finally just licked the flap and stuck it as far down onto the envelope as it would reach.  This looks like a developmentally delayed student sent it (and for the record, the essay surely reflects the same).  Whatever, at this point I had to get out of there.

"Bye Mom, love you!" *door slam*

I jump in the car.  It is 4:47.  4:47?!  I cannot make it to Yukon in 13 minutes.  I-40 West.  75 miles an hour.  Exit Garth Brooks Boulevard.  Of course, I caught every single light on that stupid street.  Why are there 5 stoplights in one block?  I got to the post office at 4:59.  I have no idea how I got there that fast.  I handed it to the polite Indian man behind the counter.

"Just for my own peace of mind, if I give this to you right now, it will be postmarked today, yes?"

"Yes ma'am."

"Okay, thank you so much."


Breathe.  When will I ever learn?